The Guard at the Gate

Is there anyone who can honestly say, “I love sitting at the computer for five hours doing busy work?”  Wouldn’t we all rather be fishing? “But I imagine even then, you probably have to look up the Websites to get the fishing permits and fill out the forms and such.

I spent my morning making changes for our Orff Summer Course brochure. It took me way too long (counting some e-mail and Skype multi-tasking) and I’m still not done. How much of our life do we spend preparing to do the thing we love, arranging it, documenting it, advertising it and so on? Why do we do it?

I suspect there is an invisible world of spirits, each assigned a particular corner of human endeavor. Their job is to make sure the bar is set high and no dilettantes can just freely walk in and out. They’re the guards at the gate demanding to see how many hours you practiced before the concert, how many hours you spent organizing the concert, how willing you are to be bored, exhausted, frustrated doing all the petty little things that lead up to your little moments of genuine pleasure. They want to know that you’re serious, that you care enough that you’re willing to sacrifice.

I have a feeling that I’ve whined about this before in these blogs (anyone keeping track?). One reading of this is simply that I’m trying to wrap a philosophy around my present reality that makes me look good— the tireless, dedicated individual doing the behind-the-scenes work that will give 100 people a lot of pleasure this summer at Orff camp. On the other hand, maybe I’m a pitiful fool who is slow to realize I need to hire someone to do this stuff. Take your pick.