“Be a seed planter, not a bean counter” says the ad in the
airport. A nice sentiment and one that my work leans to. But not lately. For
some four weeks now, it feels like bean counting is at the top of the agenda
and without active intervention, it could easily keep going in that direction.
I’m still trying to close out summer courses, book the last flights for the
Fall’s workshops, restock my various book inventories. There often is some pleasure in this kind of work, but I’m noticing that
without the creative work, without the seed planting, the bean counting isn’t
as wholly satisfying as it might be.
As any farmer knows, seed planters also have to be bean
counters and vice-versa. I’ve never been a farmer, but I admire from afar the
whole life they live by necessity far from the over-specialized culture. The
blend of creating, planning and caretaking, the mix of science, math and handy
fix-it knowledge, the living through the cycle of seed planting, bloom, fruit
and decay. In some ways, not that different from the life of an artist.
For no artist is a seed planter alone, bursting with
creative ideas that just gush forth into the air and plant themselves. We also
need to plan and caretake, blend science and math, see our seed through to its
bloom, count and share the fruit of our labors (the books, CD’s, paintings,
etc.) and accept the cycle of decay to prepare for the next potent seed. Most
of the artists I know are their own agents, their own accountants, sometimes
their own producers and publishers, their own distributors, their own bookers
and trip planners. Some do their time in the arts administration office and
some make the full switch. We all must be bean counters on some level or
another.
Despite the ad’s insinuation, it is not an either-or
proposition. It is the conversation between the planting and counting that is
at the heart of the matter. And, may I suggest, order matters. That is, the
bean counting becomes more satisfying when the seed planting and plant tending
has been fully accomplished. Or more forcefully, the creative force must be
strong enough to push through the constant invitation to merely count.
Sometimes we think we’ll just get through the bean counting and then finally be
ready for the seed planting, like a friend who was in the business world for
decades and thought to get into creative writing at retirement. Never happened.
So time for me to let the beans rest unsorted for awhile and
put my next book project on the front burner. Still trying to decide which of
eight books needs to come next (any suggestions?), but I know that the moment I do, my days will take on a
luster that they’re missing now. That chosen seed will be watered and lit by
the sun of my steady efforts and constant dreaming. Of course, some bean
counting must continue, but it will be after the seed has been dropped in the earth, watered and tended.
Happy gardening!
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