Coin in the Slot

Lunching with the students yesterday, people shared funny stories about getting into trouble when they were kids at school. I told how my 2^nd grade teacher, Miss Tomsu, threatened to tape my mouth shut for the rest of the afternoon if I didn’t stop talking. I didn’t and she did. 

 

I don’t believe it caused me any trauma that required therapy. Instead, it pointed to my future and eventual acceptance of this lifelong truth: “I can’t shut up!” Well, of course, I can. I’ve attended some ten Zen retreats where you are not allowed to talk for seven days straight. I start each workshop teaching for an hour without saying a single word. I spend a fair amount of time in Solitude and I don’t talk out loud to myself. In short, I’m not a compulsive talker. 

 

But I do have a lot to say. And if someone dares put the coin in the slot by asking me a question, I often warn them that they better buckle up. One short question, a 30-minute answer. 

 

Which is what happened yesterday at the workshop when I mentioned the folk song Liza Jane and someone said, “Isn’t that a racist song that we should cross off our list? “ Click went the seat belt and off I sped down the highway, pointing out each important landmark along the way. It wasn’t a distraction from the workshop theme of Jazz and in fact, led to the important points I wanted to make anyway about the necessary blending of Jazz, Joy & Justice when teaching this subject. But I just had to smile when I got off the soap box and asked, “Any other questions?

 

Then back to the music, that perfect blend of reflection and doing, the music alchemically transforming any of the heavy air particles released when discussing the horrors of racism and toxic narratives like white supremacy. We instantly moved from needed grief to equally needed joy. By singing what needs to be sung, dancing what needs to be danced, playing what needs to be played, it felt equally right and necessary to speak what needs to be spoken.

 

Without a single person suggesting that the group tape my mouth shut.