1. If you’re first United flight is late, your connecting flight will leave right on time.
(Not once, but twice on one trip.)
2. There are normally four customer service agents helping re-book flights, unless there’s a long line. Then there are two.
3. If there’s a piano in the airport, the person playing will be doing hokey arpeggiated shlock—and their flight won’t leave for another three hours.
Ah, travel!
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