“If you had to pick three words you would want your friends and family to say gathered around your coffin, what would they be?”
“Look, he’s moving!”
So goes one version of the old joke. But amongst other possibilities, my three words?
“He showed up.”
If you’re a student I teach or a student I taught, a friend, neighbor, colleague and certainly a family member and you have an art show, chorus concert, piano recital, amateur orchestra concert, dance show, birthday, retirement party, memorial service or the like, you can count on me to be there. I’ll put you on the calendar, move things around if needed and show up at the appointed time. I’m there to support you, to witness, to participate, to celebrate. Even if I’m not particularly interested in the thing you’re doing, I’m interested in you and want to encourage you to keep pursuing that which you love.
And so on Thursday, I spent the day helping a Level III Orff graduate rehearse her k to 3rd grade students for her first concert at the end of her first year of teaching. I made suggestions, accompanied songs on the piano and then came back that night for the performance. On Friday, drove over the Bay Bridge in rush hour after another glorious Jewish Home hour of music to join an impromptu memorial service for a friend who’s Dad had just passed away. Last night, I went to a high school concert of World Music in which one of my former students performed—with the added perk of seeing two yet older alums of both my school and that program get up on stage. (More on this later). Today, I’m off to a dance concert of yet another former student.
Of course, I’m not expecting credit for any of this, no karma points or expectations that all these folks have to show up at my concerts (though they are welcome!). I’m choosing to do this not out of duty, but for my own pleasure and my conviction that that’s what friends do. They show up for each other.
So if “he showed up” are the three words spoken around my coffin, I’ll be happy. But I also wouldn’t mind “Look, he’s moving!” J
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